05-20-20, 11:06 AM | |
VF Supporter
Join Date: Nov 2001
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I've told this story before. I was at a T-Tapp class led by Teresa herself. A heavy woman came up to me, looked me up and down and said, "You don't belong here." I wasn't sure what she meant and was a bit stunned. I forgot my reply. Something like, "Well, I'm trying to firm up." She then said, "No, you really don't belong here."
That felt great. Not!
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Goal:250 / Done 107 POSTURE CHECK! |
05-20-20, 11:15 AM | ||
Join Date: May 2006
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I do understand some of the reason for the backlash. People are sick and tired of being JUDGED. They just want to go about their business without being made to feel crummy. And in truth, if you aren't in a current mindset to take care of your health, it can feel demoralizing to watch others do it. I think most of us have been there--life happens and it can be hard to stay above water at times let alone thrive. Society fuels food addiction to the level of insanity while guilting us for being gluttons and shaming us to the point that we'll buy anything to escape the emotional turmoil of it all. And we still have jobs, kids and ailing parents etc. The pressure can be a bit much! After seeing a recent media blurb, I had an acquaintance say that she didn't feel all that bad seeing "thin oppressors" getting a taste of their own medicine. She's struggling with her diabetes and recently added insulin. She has gained so much weight in the past year and is completely stressed out about increasing health issues. It seems to be a vicious cycle and I feel bad for her. She will make off-handed remarks about my body, lunch foods, walking more when I can etc. I know she is struggling so my responses are kind but I would be skewered if I made similar comments about her choices. I think what we really need is a "celebration of health and compassion" movement. Life is beautiful and we are carrying far too much baggage. People are always better when they just feel loved. They are far more likely to take better care of themselves without the crushing stress of disapproval. We all see the stories about body transformations inspired by rejection or bullying. But I question the value of that. We don't need people who are obsessed with gaining adoration or avoiding cruelty. We need a sense of community that encourages mental and physical health.
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Taiga |
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05-20-20, 11:38 AM | |
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Texas
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I have a question. I have a friend who has been losing weight (she is trying to). Is it ok to comment and try to encourage her? I love her and think she is beautiful no matter what size she is. How do you encourage someone who is trying to lose weight?
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05-20-20, 11:55 AM | ||
Join Date: Nov 2001
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I had someone comment that I was looking "fit" and I was more comfortable with that than other comments, but I still prefer for people just to not say anything at all. Erica |
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05-20-20, 12:01 PM | ||
Join Date: May 2006
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Personally, I agree with Erica. I don't like people commenting on my body, though I try to be as polite as possible and respect their intentions.
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Taiga |
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05-20-20, 12:08 PM | ||
VF Supporter
Join Date: Jul 2008
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And a big +1 "like" to Taiga's spot-on post. Vintage, I cannot believe that happened to you at a T-tapp class -- that's horrible!!
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I am @summitbee on instagram. |
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05-20-20, 12:19 PM | ||
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: I love that dirty water...
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Quote:
I'm like the others in that I prefer people don't comment on my body size--one way or the other. I know some people who really want you to notice if they've lost weight, so I try to keep the focus on wellness, not how you look. |
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Tags |
body comments, body image, fit-shaming, weight loss |
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